Withdrawal Fear

His description of the video generation is a good description of professing people and workers who rarely if ever watch television, movies or videos.  A large proportion of professing people and workers can’t seem to logically process facts, information and scripture to make decisions because most of their decisions have always been made for them and they have been spoon fed incorrect answers to non existent questions all their lives. They don’t analyze the information, they look at where it comes from instead. They have no respect for outsiders whom they regard as worthless in God’s eyes.  They don’t look at scripture as instructional for practical everyday decisions or as information they need to understand.  They simply look at it in order to have something to say at meeting or as instructional for the ministry.  They are so deceived by illogical ideas that even when they leave the group which confused them they are still unable to regain their reasoning abilities.  They resist learning and reasoning through scripture perhaps because they are so ingrained with fear or anger against the Word of God and against Christians who might try to help them.  

3.)  FEAR of any historical or Christian information that doesn’t come from the workers.  They believe that anything that doesn’t originate with the workers is from Satan or is false.

4.)  FEAR of being deceived.  The friends are taught to be suspicious and fearful of all Christians.  They are not warned against Buddhism, Hinduism, Atheism, New Age, Mormonism, Jehovah’s Witnesses, witchcraft, sorcery, or secular humanism, etc. They have been warned against Christian information because they are told it will confuse them.  It certainly does confuse them because it is diametrically opposed to the workers’ false doctrines. They are taught to judge people by whether they have fellowship with the workers and meetings in the home not by the fact that they believe in Jesus or have been born again or know and study His Word.

5.)  FEAR of making a decision.  Many personal, doctrinal and recreational decisions are already made for professing people.  When, or if they leave the meetings they have very little ability to make good decisions because of lack of experience.  Members are led to feel that they are too ignorant to understand doctrinal concepts and theology.  Most are afraid to trust their own judgment.  Many go through years of bad decision making and moral blunders.

6.)  FEAR of being spoken against.  They know how the friends and workers talk about people who challenge them.  “Oh, he is just a tool of Satan.  “Don’t listen to that poison!”  “Stay away from books and the internet.” “Oh, she just wanted to take her own way.”  “They have gone back to the World!  They always were worldly!  Satan has taken hold of their lives.”

7.)  FEAR of being “a stumbling block to someone”.  This is one of the workers biggest warnings.  And this keeps people from telling others what they know.

8.)  FEAR of loss of status or prestige.  Those with meeting in their homes, workers in their families and convention on their property have a great deal of status.  If they leave the group they will become nobodies.   It is better to be a big fish in a small pond than nobody in no pond.

9.)  FEAR of having to start a new career.  Workers who leave the work will have to find a way of supporting themselves financially and many of them are not capable of doing that, at least not immediately.

10.)  FEAR of divorce.  Professing families are usually dysfunctional and many of them are in serious melt down.  Asking questions or bucking the system is dangerous to marital life.  Workers have actually sabotaged marriages if one spouse objects to their authority.   They encourage the professing person to stop sleeping with the dissenter or make broad hints about thinking about another place to live, etc.  Even though the workers publicly make great declarations against divorce, they will sometimes privately make other suggestions if they think they might lose a person.  Losing professing people is hard on their pride.

11.) FEAR of the unknown.  It is very similar to a slave who has been set free feeling unable to cope with freedom.

12.)  FEAR of death and ‘who would have my funeral?’  For those who have not established themselves in a Christian church, they know that when they die, their professing family is likely to conduct their funeral through the auspices of workers.    And the workers usually make comments about where the deceased has gone.  They would be judged to hell no matter how godly and saved they may have been.

13.)  FEAR of displeasing God by questioning what the workers have said or done.  Members believe that the workers speak for God.  To question a worker is to question God.

14.)  FEAR of excommunication.  This has always been the most common method of quieting those who challenge the workers.  They will invariably say, “Oh, they chose to leave.  We didn’t put them out, they put themselves out.”  However, if one asks the excommunicated person one will find out that this is definitely untrue and that the person is totally shattered by the workers’ decision.  Many excommunicated people feel eternally lost or at least without anywhere to turn for fellowship or friends.

15.) FEAR of rejection by family members.  The workers count on parents and grandparents to keep children in meeting.  Parents are made to feel unapproved and worthless if their children do not profess or if they leave meetings. Therefore some parents become very abusive to children and grown children who reject the workers.

16.)  FEAR of appearing foolish.  Workers mock outsiders.

17.)  FEAR of being wrong.  FEAR: “What if the workers are right?”

18.)  FEAR of being accused of starting another religion.  This is a common worker accusation against workers or friends who have strong scriptural objections to the workers beliefs.

19.)  FEAR of hurting or worrying one’s parents.  Respect for one’s parents keeps the majority of professing people inside the group, even when they are extremely dissatisfied.  Parents spend so much time conditioning the children to behave and believe in the workers that if their children ever reject the workers, the parents feel that their whole lives were wasted.  Parents of unprofessing children are either pitied or less respected.  They definitely lose face and status in the church if their children leave the group.

20.)  FEAR of the grapevine.  Professing people are not loyal to one another.  They are loyal to the group or the workers.  It is more common than not to have confidences betrayed.  Members will act sympathetic to one another, when in reality they will run to the workers immediately to tell all they know about someone’s questions or confidences.  This will begin a series of “being preached at” in meeting.  The workers rarely have the gumption to come talk to someone face to face because they run the risk of confrontation or being asked questions they can’t or won’t answer.  So their method is to preach at the person in every gospel meeting or Bible study or Sunday morning meeting. 

21.)  A worker’s FEAR of admitting to one’s self that one has preached a false gospel or supported an unscriptural doctrine.   Workers and ex workers have the difficult task of wondering how many people they may have influenced to believe a lie when they preached “the ministry without a home and the meetings in the home.”   The best answer is to pray for those people and to contact them if at all possible.  But ultimately God is in control of salvation.

22.)  FEAR of losing an inheritance from professing parents or grandparents.  This sometimes happens but it also happens to professing people as well because professing people often leave their whole inheritance to the workers.

23.)  FEAR of being without a church.  FEAR of entering a church building.  This amounts to a real physical anxiety attack in some cases.

24.)  FEAR of responsibility of making a decision. Many members are so accustomed to letting others choose for them because they don’t trust themselves but they trust other people who act like they know what they are talking about.  They trust the workers because they think that the only ulterior motive would be love of money and since the workers don’t seem interested in money, they assume they can trust the workers.  Some workers and professing people have lived with hidden sin all their lives and have little sense of responsibility for their behavior.  The assume that since they are part of the “chosen few” and they are consistent in meeting attendance that will somehow make up for their immoral and sinful behavior.  There are lots of other ulterior motives besides money…..some are love of power, love of prestige, laziness, sexual opportunities with little chance for censure.  And for many workers it isn’t a lust for anything except a true desire to do what they have been led to believe is right.

25.)  FEAR of taking a stand for what one believes.  FEAR of confessing with one’s mouth that one actually believes in Jesus instead of the workers.  This is a huge problem for professing people, which seems strange because they spent so many hours giving testimonies in meeting but cannot confess with their mouths to friends and family that they believe in Jesus instead of the workers.

26.) FEAR of scorn and shunning from friends, workers and family. 

27.)  FEAR of finding out you wasted your life.  This is a crushing thought to those who have invested a whole life and all their resources to the group.

28.)  FEAR of “eating crow.”  Nearly every professing person has at one time or another tried to prove to their unprofessing friends and relatives that “this is the only true church.”  When one discovers that this is not only untrue but that the group is actually a pseudo-Christian cult, it is very difficult to admit that one has been duped.

29.)  FEAR of asking questions.  The workers disapprove of questions and anyone who asks them!  Professing people don’t even know what questions to ask.  They have no idea how to begin asking good questions which would help them make decisions.

30.)  FEAR of getting answers.  The friends are afraid of finding out something that will conflict with what they have accepted as truth.  “My mind is made up.  Don’t confuse me with the facts.”

31.)  FEAR of reality.  The workers have always determined truth and reality for their followers.  Those who leave realize that now they must attempt to figure out what truth is.  Just like Pilate, many say, “What is truth?” and then give up on the quest.

32.)  FEAR that people will accuse them of forsaking God or of wanting to be worldly.  Most members love God with all their hearts.  They hate to have ANYONE think that they are turning their backs on God.

33.)  FEAR of financial loss if one is working for a professing employer.

34.)  FEAR of verbal confrontation.  Many workers, even the most softspoken, are capable of being verbally sharp and hostile when faced with questions they don’t want to deal with.  Most members are scripturally ignorant and easily impressed by anyone who can quote a few verses.  They are at an extreme disadvantage when faced with two scripture spouting workers.  The workers are careful to always stay together when confronting someone they suspect as a dissenter.  Two against one is always safer for them.  Professing people are conditioned to respect the workers, therefore they are usually reticent to argue with them, even when they know the workers have no understanding and no ability to answer questions.

35.) FEAR of having no friends.  The mental isolation of the group restricts one’s communication skills with outsiders and makes many people shy.  Moreover, the strange dress code and the poor attitude towards grooming put professing people at a disadvantage. It offends normal people who have no idea why a person would look or act the way many professing people do.  Yes, there are many professing people who look more normal than in the past, but a very large number still live with the Tramp mentality.

36.)  FEAR and misunderstanding of the Christian Faith.  The Christian Faith is a rational faith based on the logic of the Word of God, the historicity of the Resurrection of Christ and the reliable track record of fulfillment of prophetic scripture.  The workers and friends think that faith is irrational, illogical and based on the word of the workers.

37.)  FEAR of taking a stand against the workers and family members regarding scripture and doctrine.  Many people will leave meetings and live an immoral lifestyle without rejection, but if they ever begin to talk about scripture or Christian beliefs they will face immediate censure and rejection.  Many ex 2x2s will never tell their professing relatives if they begin going to another church for fear of what will happen.  They well know the anger that their professing parents will display.

38.)  FEAR of saying “Praise Jesus” or “Praise the Lord.”  They know those words are scorned by the workers and friends.

39.)  FEAR of scripture and of knowledge of the Bible.  They think that if they know more about the Bible that God will expect more of them.  They misunderstand the verse, “To whom much is given, much is required.”  The Bible is a logical book and one that can be understood if it is studied correctly.  God commands us to study it. and of actually trying to understand it for ones’ self.  The friends have been led to believe that they don’t need to know or understand scripture. They will often say, “We don’t need to know things, we just need to be a light.  People don’t care about how much you know, they just want to know how much you care”.

40.)  FEAR of being happy.  The workers have an unbalanced view of life and have conditioned everyone to believe that God wants people to be miserable now in order to qualify for joy in heaven.  The workers believe that sorrow and dying to self are attributes of those who have the Spirit.  Therefore, depression is probably the most common emotion of the friends and workers.   Suicidal thoughts are not uncommon.

41.)  FEAR of trusting one’s own judgment and beliefs.  Most people raised in the group are conditioned to feel ignorant and unworthy.  This unworthy feeling undermines confidence in one’s ability to understand scriptural teaching or form strong personal convictions.  The workers often talk about how dumb sheep are and make people afraid to try to understand scripture.  In fact, they don’t think that it is possible to understand it.  The workers symbolize scripture to make it mean something else so that confuses people into thinking that one must have a spirit interpret scripture for them.  This approach to scripture is devilish.  The Holy Spirit doesn’t interpret the scripture to mean something different than what it says.  The Holy Spirit convicts us of sin and He gives us a hunger and thirst to know God by studying the scripture.  Don’t just read scripture, study it!

42.)  FEAR of breaking the unspoken rules of etiquette by speaking out.  Members raised within the group are much more controlled by the etiquette of silence.  Newcomers are much braver about speaking up or speaking out because they didn’t learn the worker etiquette as a child.

43.)  FEAR of challenging the workers’ traditions and Irvine’s legalism which are referred to as the “standards of the Kingdom.”

44.)  FEAR of the anger one feels about the situation.  The anger is spawned by a feeling of helplessness.  “What can I do?” The emotions one feels in the situation are rather like a roller coaster ride.  It is almost impossible to be emotionally calm while visiting with other members or workers because the feeling of wanting to yell becomes so strong.

45.)  FEAR of Christian churches and doctrines.  Negative conditioning of a lifetime, words and experiences that one cannot even remember are extremely hard to overcome.   One way of dealing with this is to begin to listen to Christian radio and classical Christian praise music.

46.)  FEAR of appearing to be in the position of “judging one’s brothers”.  Sincere people continue to love their friends and family.  It is extremely hard to think of old friends as lost and it is awful to feel or have them feel that one is judging them.

47.) FEAR that someone will find out that one is investigating information regarding church doctrine and history.  People often rent a Post Office box or have it sent to their work address or a neighbor’s address simply to hide the fact that they are searching for answers to their legitimate, honest questions.  Others have even left town and stayed in a motel in order to study the material they sent for.  And some have kept all their books, names and addresses and historical information under lock and key just to keep friends and relatives from knowing they are studying information that exposes the church as a fraud.

48.) FEAR of hurting other people’s feelings by taking a stand for Jesus Christ and disagreeing with the workers’ beliefs.

49.)  FEAR of distressing other people by sharing information.  Those who have gone through the pain of examining their beliefs have a paradoxical attitude toward sharing information with friends and family.  They hate to put their loved ones through the same pain they experienced, yet they have a strong desire to set them free and share with them the true gospel that will give them great joy.  A person snared in this group cannot escape it without going through a great deal of mental and emotional confusion first.  One experiences a great paradigm shift.

50.)  FEAR of the condescending “Pity” expressed by the friends and workers when they find out one has questions about the doctrine of the “Truth”.  They treat one as if he has amnesia or has become feeble minded and contracted leprosy at the same time.  “Poor Glen has just become so confused!”  He is getting old you know.  Or, “Isn’t he having mental problems?” “She has lost all her understanding!”  They ask strange questions, like “Do you remember Alice? (a worker you knew all your life)  Remember when convention is?  The workers claim that people who leave meeting lose all memory of what they once knew.

51.)  FEAR of feeling guilty.  Guilt is so programmed into the mindset that it hampers every decision a professing person makes.

52.)  FEAR of those who may be further along in the withdrawal process.  Someone just beginning to examine the doctrine and information about the group is very wary of anyone who has been studying the situation longer.  Therefore, it is helpful to have several people from varying perspectives to discuss the issues with, in order to realize that it is possible to come to conclusions of one’s own, without being forced to accept someone else’s conclusions.

53.)  Afraid to trust what Jesus did as sufficient for salvation.  They can’t believe that Jesus did it all.  They don’t have faith in Jesus because they don’t believe that He is God the Son.  They have been taught that they must earn salvation.

54.)  FEAR that one’s questions will get a friend or relative in trouble with the workers.  The workers always try to isolate the source of information.  If anyone questions the workers’ doctrines, they will immediately try to find out the source so they can pronounce it as evil.  They are always more concerned with the source of the questions than in answering the questions.

55.)  FEAR of being gossiped about among the friends and workers.  The workers are known to spread untrue rumors in order to keep people away from someone who has left meetings.

56.)  FEAR of being used as an object lesson in a sermon and lied about.  This is a common sermon topic with some workers.

57.)  FEAR of lost security.  All one’s friends and family have been in this group for 4 or 5 generations.  Where will one find a new social structure and family?

58.)  FEAR of strangers.  They find it fairly difficult to talk to people who have a broad range of interests and experiences.  Not all professing people are introverted but many of them are.  It may have something to do with how many generations of their family have professed.

59.)  FEAR of alienating the friends and relatives with whom one wants to explain the true gospel.  The group mindset is so foreign to scriptural doctrines and concepts that it is an enormous task to explain the differences.  Since the words and scriptures have different meanings to a professing person, anyone who attempts a brief conversational dialog will become extremely frustrated because professing people almost universally refuse to listen to even a five minute statement of belief.  One is usually allowed only one attempt, then the professing person or worker will rarely allow another discussion.

Look through the preceding list.  Are there any other FEARS that haven’t been mentioned?  Examine exactly what you are afraid of and verbalize it or write it down. 

Begin an all-out investigation for yourself. This truly is a matter of life or death, heaven or hell.  Write to all the addresses available, look at the information on the internet, talk to all the people you can find, look at the historical evidence, investigate the doctrinal differences.  Do your own research!  Don’t take anyone’s opinion or advice.  Be thorough.  Information can’t hurt you.  Your eternal welfare is at stake.  This is the most important subject you could ever study.  You haven’t really made a choice until you have learned the whole story and checked all angles.

Paul Hauck observes that things usually get worse before they get better.  If a person has been trying to avoid a confrontation or an issue all his life, the FEAR may seem exaggerated at first.  Learning to relate to situations that one hasn’t faced before is stressful, up and down, back and forth, very confusing.  One must expect a learning curve.  Facing the fear is the only way to find resolution.

Asking questions is not doubting God.  Asking questions is evidence that you want to know God and understand His Word!  Asking questions is the way you find out if you have been deceived by men or women or even your own parents.  Parents can be fooled too.  The less questions one asks, the more likely one can be deceived.